Tag: lmao
Not a Free Healer- Alabyn/Jhasi
forgottenchampions:
The mer stared the khajiit deadpan in the face as the profanities were hurled at him. That was fine- two could play that game. <”Hold still and th-this wouldn’t be a p-p-problem.”> He responded rather curtly in surprisingly fluent Dunmeris. He exhaled, blonde strands of hair flew out of his face, before going back to the artery. He was nearly finished patching up the tissue before the khajiit jerked forward, undoing most of his work.
<“D-dammit, hold st-still y-y-you’re reopeni–”> Alabyn gritted his teeth, having enough difficulty patching up the small but potentially lethal cut in his shoulder. He stretched his lips thin and his eyes rolled as the khajiit spat out another set of obscenities. Seeing he was going to get nowhere with his… ‘patient,’ the mer clutched his shoulder to the chair– enough was enough. His cold blue eyes shot daggers at the khajiit.
<“Alright you.”> The mer raised his voice. <”For th-the record you have an-an open arter-uh-… artery. You c-c-can either bleed out or y-uh-.. you can hold still and– an-an-and let me do my godsd-damned job.”>
J’hasi’s face twisted into a snarl, a bit of panic rising when he was pinned in place, but flicking his ears back at the mer’s reprimand. He was going to throw up, he just knew it, everything was just… And he was getting cold… Where was…? The Khajiit’s teeth chattered in pain and shock before he hissed quietly.
“<Wh-who th’fuck are you?>” he snapped, shuddering as another wave of nausea washed over him, gagging a little but keeping the contents of his stomach down for now. He was wavering between pain and awareness versus weakness and unconsciousness and he wasn’t appreciating it with a stranger holding him down with their fingers buried two knuckles deep into his shoulder. J’hasi squeezed his eyes shut, teeth bared in a silent hiss. He wasn’t too keen on dying just yet, he still had a cure to find, but by the Hist this fetcher was not gentle in the least.
therunawayscamp:
There was a certain attitude common to all guardsmen across Tamriel, or any other continent, for that matter. They all had the Stance, the way of standing to attention while somehow still slouching, and the Walk, the rolling gait which could keep a person moving through a whole night shift. They eyed up potential criminal scum in the same way. They all knew how to look like they were running in hot pursuit and yet somehow, mysteriously, never manage to catch up with the heavily armed mer disappearing around a corner.
And they all reacted the same way when approached by a citizen right when things looked calm. Citizens were never good news. They often turned out to be criminals in disguise, and they always expected the guards, most unfairly, to do their job.
The guardsman on the right of the door eyed J’hasi with unfettered suspicion. Plenty of Dunmer had been slinking back and forth since they locked up a load the ship which had docked that morning. It was hard to say, in the eyes of a Nord, whether being bothered by a Khajiit instead was an improvement or not. The other guard, a young woman, sighed, glanced in the direction of the nearest inn, and said,
‘Aye? What do you need?’
J’hasi faked a shiver, enough to hopefully convince the guard that he wasn’t covering his face for any other reason than sheer cold.
“I’m missing m’coinpurse, and me mam’s home sick with somethin’ fierce. I was on the way t’ the alchemist ‘ere in town an’ when I got to the door, it was gone! Can you please ‘elp me? I don’t think she’ll make the night without ‘er tonic.” Petty thievery wasn’t that dangerous of a job, and catching thieves seemed to be one of a guards’ favorite activities in his experience… Would they bite, though? Or just be lazy and shoo him off? He had to sweeten the deal to make sure.
“I stopped at the inn fer a bit t’ thaw out m’tail, but tha’s the last time I ‘ad t’pull out some coin.” He shivered again, his tail puffing out twice its size. A chill breeze had picked the exact moment to blow up the back of his jacket and freeze all up his spine. All the better for the facade, but still unpleasant.
[Also him not giving a fuck about Maven Whats-Her-Face bc uh Dark Brotherhood? Yeah whatever they sent like what a couple dozen guys and they still couldn’t kill me, I’m real scared :/]
💬
Send 💬 and my muse will say what they really think about yours.
“I mean…a little odd, but she seems to mean well. Got some secrets to hide, but who doesn’t? I wouldn’t be jumping at the chance to tell Skyrim’s magic-hating populace I’ve got some magical undead dog running around getting into my food.” J’hasi sighed, rubbing the back of his neck.
“There’s always the chance that she’s actually a Thalmor spy…but I haven’t smelled anything off about her.” Or anything other than the dozens upon dozens of herbs and roots and Hist knew what else crammed into that tiny space. His nose twitched and he rubbed it in response, remembering how numb it would be when he left after each visit.
“Usually spies act a little more…impenetrable. No weaknesses. She was practically begging me not to speak about her…housemate, which if she were a spy, that…that would be too much attention, wouldn’t it? Unless it’s to throw someone off about the fact that they’re a spy…” The Khajiit’s brow furrowed, thinking for a few moments before he shook his head, ridding himself of the conundrum for now.
“I-it doesn’t matter. Unless she shows her hand, far as I’m concerned she’s helping me get some sleep.” He frowned a little, teeth pressing against his lower lip.
“…she might just be a witch. A witch wouldn’t give a damn about what the Thalmor want.”
👨❤️💋👨!
👨❤️💋👨 How would they react if the person they fell in love with turned out to be a criminal?
Oh boy. Considering how difficult it would be for J’hasi to develop romantic heart-feels for someone else in the first place, the situation itself is highly unlikely but I’ll give it a shot.
J’hasi’s got a pretty messy track record himself, so he’s really not in a place to judge (even if he felt inclination to, because…he’s run into a lot of people who’ve been wrongfully imprisoned so honestly being in jail doesn’t mean you’re a terrible person, sometimes just desperate and/or unlucky/stigmatized). Not only that, you’d either have to be an extraordinarily good actor (with skills to fool even a hypervigilant, intelligence-gathering secret agent werewolf who’s survived multiple abusive relationships in the past) or use some sort of magic/potions to get J’hasi to like you in that sort of way if you’re actually a terrible person. So while there’s a small chance he could fall for someone with a criminal record, the chances of him falling for a terrible, bad, awful person who’s also a criminal is next to nil.
…aaaand I realized I didn’t really answer the question, oops! Uhmmm… Honestly there might be a bit of surprise, a moment of suspicion if they were involved in crimes such as slave trafficking or what have you, but if the crime wasn’t that, then J’hasi’s kind of a ‘*shrug* okay’ sort of deal. He’s stolen several fortunes’ worth away from rich folk to give to the poor, and he leans more towards chaotic good anyway so if it was desperation or intent to do good, then he’s p cool with it.
“Are you enjoying yourself?”
J’hasi grinned, Ghost snorting into his mane between his ears, trying to reach his tankard without success.
“Free food and drink, good enough for me. Might try the archery contest, actually, provided I’m not drunk by then.” The pale mare butted her head between his shoulderblades, knocking him forward a step before he laughed and rubbed over her forehead with his knuckles, allowing her a small drink.
whatdosendhelp replied to your post : whatdosendhelp replied to your post : [Ok, useless…
{{ I love Cyrodiil BECAUSE it’s so whitebread? Like. Y’all are a bunch of problematic stereotypical Western High Fantasy trashbags, it’s ridiculous, and for some reason it amuses the hell out of me. All of my Imperial characters are petty little shitlords, though. I could see watermelon itself growing really well in southeastern Cyrodiil, where it’s generally pretty humid and rainy and probably doesn’t even get particularly cold in the winter. Kind of like the American south, climate-wise?
[I mean I know Cyrodiil was originally supposed to be tropical in climate, but then the game came out and something about Talos or a Dragon Break or some sort of magic/divine fuckery that’s p common in TES made it possibly temperate??
I always thought of it being temperate to right on the border of tropical just so I didn’t get an aneurysm trying to figure out what the fuck was going on (obvs the northern part being much closer to temperate but iirc the game starts end of summer/fall?? WHY IS THERE SO MUCH SNOW)
And according to the map it’s grown all over sans Bruma area so… Though watermelon only takes about 100 days to grow properly (climate?? Not sure if prime climate or just in general) so maybe you just get smaller ones more north than in the south. Maybe the devs just wanted to drive TES nerds up a wall.
There’s a map showing where the farms are so I’d think that around Leyawiin (which I think would be much closer to tropical, ofc since it’s so close to Elsweyr/Black Marsh and just seems like a wetter climate in general) you’d get these nice big melons, while just north of the Imperial City you’d have smaller ones if you tried to grow them outside of summer. I have no idea of the actual scale of Cyrodiil, or how quickly climates shift from area to area, and I haven’t played in so long I don’t remember the landscape all that well, I’d have to look;;;]
whatdosendhelp replied to your post : [Ok, useless watermelon fact time! They grow in…
{{ I’m super allergic to watermelon usually… but I wonder if I could get away with eating the Moon-and-star variety because it looks delicious 😗 Also I am all for Cyrodiil having all sorts of produce you just can’t get in Skyrim. If it doesn’t grow indigenously, you’d bet your ass they’d find a way to import the yummy stuff and start growing it within the province, if possible }}
[I’d check with a doc or have an epipen at the ready coz I’m not sure how different it is/if it still has the bits you’re allergic to but but yeye I getcha I kinda wanna get one too O3O
And lmao yeah Cyrodiil’s just like ‘oh I like this. And this. And this too. This is mine now. Long live the Empire.’ I’m likely to give the farms a complete rundown at this rate to find out what’s imported and what’s not because…I honestly never gave Cyrodiil much of a rundown because it seemed so whitebread to me. But I should give it a better look, I gotta, J’hasi’s been there for a decent part of his life, possibly survived off of nicking stuff here and there from the farms… I gotta know how much trouble he’d get for nicking watermelon and the like lmao]
“What a shame, for I dearly love to laugh.”
He was almost a little cross. Almost. But the smile on Brielle’s face, trying to restrain giggles (and failing) had him smiling too, even despite the fact that he was soaked in muddy water and rapidly getting chilled. Ghost nickered, drawing closer and snorting a puff of air in the Khajiit’s face, seeming a little apologetic for her enthusiastic jump that had landed him in the puddle in the first place. J’hasi pat her nose (leaving a muddy handprint behind) before grabbing her mane to help him get up, water streaming off his limbs and tail.
“Yeah, okay, fine, it was a little funny.” He halfheartedly flicked a little muddy water off his fingertips at his friend, more of a tease than actually trying to get her dirty.
vvardenfellcat 